Dear loyal followers,
I’m very bored today. I’m waiting to go to my best friend Snow’s house for dinner. I’m trying to get my Mum to bring me out straight away but she keeps making excuses. Apparently Snow is at school or gone to the moon or something until dinner time. If she has gone to the moon we could have a lot to discuss at dinner time…
In the meantime, I’ve been examining photos of myself. They’re the best kind of photos. I have some nice ones taken on my recent royal tour of Wales. I’m officially royal now because I have a prince outfit and also because a lot of the castles in Wales had my surname attached to them. That wasn’t quite good enough so I’ve renamed them all too. Castle Oink. Oink Castle. Chateau d’Oink. Oinkburg. Castle Oink 2. There were so many that I ran out of names…
Here’s a photo of me dressed as a Prince at Castle Oink in Caernarfon. I made Daddy carry me all the way to the top of the tallest tower so that I could shout instructions at all the tourists but they couldn’t hear me because it was too windy.
And here I am at Oink Castle in Beaumaris, also known as Beau-Oink-is. I particularly liked the moat at this castle, it would be fantastic for throwing people into when they disagree with me. I’ll have to make sure it’s full of rotten vegetables and other nasty smelling things… I ran around inside the walls for ages, it was great fun jumping out to scare all the tourists. They shouldn’t have been trespassing in my castle anyway, into the moat with them!
I really enjoyed my trip to Wales, it’s my type of country. They even have a dragon on their flag which is almost as good as having my face on it. I guess nowhere can be perfect. I’m going to ask Santa for a dragon this year, it would look good in the promotional video’s I’m planning for my new regime.
I’ll let you know how I get on at Snow’s house tonight 🙂