My Christmas Present

Loyal Followers,

I apologise for my absence over the past few months. Let it be known that I have sacked my editor (who was useless anyway) and I have hired Elmo to be my new personal assistant. He will now be doing the boring typing bits for me while I lie back, eat peeled grapes and shout at him a lot.

It will take some time to get back up and running (the outgoing editor may have tried to sabotage things on her way out) so in the meantime, here’s a photo of me at Christmas. I got a trike. And employed Ted to do the actual work. My little brother seems to think that it’s a time-share trike. It’s not. I’ve licked it all over so he won’t want it any more. Unfortunately, he thought that was funny and tried to bite my nose… He may have to go live with his grandparents…

(null)

I will be in contact. Possibly in code. Possibly when you least expect it. Possibly when Elmo has finished sorting my grapes by size.

Oink

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