Monthly Archives: March 2012

My Girlfriend Molly!!!

I’m so excited to get down to Waterford today…. Mummy drove like granny and Daddy nearly smothered me when I simply asked “Are we there yet?”. Such a simple question!! Child abuse I tell you!! Here’s my girl!! 🙂

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Zoink

My long lost cousin visited today. He’s very mysterious, he appears from nowhere, fights the evil squirrels, raids the chocolate press and then disappears again very suddenly. It has been pointed out that he reminds people of somebody. I have … Continue reading

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How to sneak onto a hen party and get to see fairy gardens

Last weekend I accomplished something that most men several times my age (and height) never could. I attended a hen party! This was not easily done, I had to spend several weeks sneakily building up to it. Here’s how I … Continue reading

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Duck for dinner?

Today I went to the park. My aim was to visit the pond area to have a chat with the ducks. Every mini dictator has to start somewhere and I was going to start with my duck-powered air force. I’d … Continue reading

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Book sale

Today my mother went to a secondhand book sale. She asked me if I would like her to bring me home something so I spent ages making this list. 1. The Bumper Book of Poisons 2. The Dummies Guide to … Continue reading

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Cake

I am most aggrieved. People keep eating my cake without even asking me first. I need to think up interesting ways to punish them, I’m currently thinking along the lines of water torture… They know who they are, a donation … Continue reading

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My 2nd Birthday!!!!

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I’m 2 now… Closer to ruling the world! All my brothers joined in to blow the candles out. Since I’m so old and doubled my age… Does that mean I double my pocket money???

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Greetings Earthlings

My name is Oink. In this blog I shall be sharing words of wisdom and whatever happens to be going through my mind. My life is very exciting so this may not be suitable for children. My main ambition is … Continue reading

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